


A Gut Feeling You Can't Wait Out

by woke_up_on_derse



Category: Pillars of Eternity
Genre: F/F, Masturbation, Public Masturbation, Unrequited Lust, Xoti has had a long day and she deserves to feel good, well it's mostly public but they are asleep so maybe that doesn't count
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-13
Updated: 2018-10-13
Packaged: 2019-08-01 15:47:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16287371
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/woke_up_on_derse/pseuds/woke_up_on_derse
Summary: It's no secret that Xoti feels insecure about her lack of experience, but maybe she can find solace in knowing she isn't alone in this?In which Xoti realizes that Pallegina is very pretty, even if she is a meanie to her.





	A Gut Feeling You Can't Wait Out

**Author's Note:**

> Can you believe that, at the time of posting this, there is no porn of Xoti? I am here to right that wrong and deliver justice. Xoti deserves it and so do we.

Xoti feels as though the further north she goes, the more dirt she ends up eating. She likes to consider herself a competent and dutiful servant of Gaun, but as her travels continue, she finds herself face down and prone in the dirt more times than she'd care to be. If it weren't for Pallegina, she may have been squashed underfoot by those rotghasts, and what a great way to go _that_ would've been. But no, Pallegina has the ability to save people from the brink of death and out of the coldest of knock-outs and Xoti, a priestess, has no idea how. She isn't, per se, _ungrateful_ that she did so, but she is a little bitter that she's capable of doing that despite not worshipping any god. That's kind of _her_ job.

But she is an adult, and she knows how to say please and thank you.

"Hey, uh, Pallegina? Thanks for that one, real nice of you."

"It is part of my duty to the Watcher. No thanks is necessary." Pallegina does not face you as she says this. A shame. She has such a nice face; with those bright feathers accentuating her eyes, and her kiss-ably full lips, and her-

Xoti shakes herself out of it. Not the time. Instead, she asks the question (or at least one of them) on her mind. "Can you tell me how you get those paladin powers? You don't pay your respects to anybody in secret, do you?"

And now she turns to Xoti, cleaning blood off of her breastplate. "I pay respects to the Republics. Nothing and no one deserves my loyalty other than my country. They are my duty and, more than that, my family. The ducs are my parents and the citizens my children. I need nothing more and I will accept nothing less."

 _Killjoy_ , thinks Xoti, _Guess that's why she doesn't get close to people. Why would she need superfluous things like "loved ones" and do stupid things like "talking to people outside of her three friends" or "dating"._

_I bet she's a virgin, too._

And boy howdy does that thought make Xoti's cheeks flare. It's such a stupid little thing, but she's always getting stuck on it. See, Xoti isn't the best at dating. She's bold and loud and a touch sacrilegious, but still unshakeable and uncompromising in her faith. This doesn't appeal to a wide range of people. She tries her best not to beat herself up about it, but she's worried that she'll turn 30 and still have no experience. What kind of person wants a clueless 30 year old?! But, if someone like Pallegina can still be. . . appealing in spite of her innocence, well, maybe she has a chance as well. And it's not as though innocence is always _un_ attractive. It's not like Xoti would _mind_ being the first person to spread her legs and do, uh.., sex things with her.

Truth be told, she doesn't really know _what_ two girls do when they wanna have sex. And it drives. her. mad. 

"Well, I can't speak for anyone else, but I would prefer to go no further tonight." says Aloth, "Time heals all wounds of course and- *yawn* I've got a few on my back that could use that treatment."

After a few minutes of debate, shorter than most "debates" amongst the party, the five of them (Aloth, Eder, Pallegina, and of course Xoti and the Watcher) start to get ready for bed. _Fantastic timing_ , thinks Xoti, _I can't stand up straight another minute_. And it's true; in this shape she couldn't even fend off a gul one-on-one. But it's a mixed truth, she realizes as her friends (and coworker) start to disrobe. Not as fantastic timing as it could be for poor, horny little Xoti.

Aloth is always in his underthings first, having both light Aedyran armor (not too many layers, not too many straps, not too warm in the hot Aedyran climate) and also the Aedyran attitude about being as naked as possible/polite in any given setting (yet again, Aedyrans are not too fond of being any warmer than they must). Aloth is.... unfairly built, given his profession as a wizard ("arcane knight" she recalls the term being, as it is nicer than "knights who are too scared to get up close but aren't scared of being called nerds"). Xoti wonders if it's because of Iselmyr's influence. Maybe she's like a werewolf who, once every full moon, flees into the woods; but instead of going hunting with her bare hands like a savage animal, she beelines to her bench press and protein shake stash. Surely Aloth doesn't work out just for fun. The elf does nothing for fun. Ever.

This train of thought distracts her until motion in her peripheral draws her eyes elsewhere. Eder drops his chainmail to the ground with a pleasant clatter and clang and raises his arms above his head, stretching gratefully after getting a fuller range of motion back. He's still flush from battle and sweaty, but like, in a sexy way. As hot as that armor looks, the tips of Xoti's ears were giving it a run for it's money. She knows it isn't to impress anyone, but the stretching makes the muscles in his arms bulge like, uh, oiled weasels fighting for dominance under his skin. But like, in a sexy way.

Aloth, sympathetic soul that he is, taps her on the shoulder. "Just wanted to let you know that everyone else is ready for bed. So if you felt like working on that instead of just standing there... wordlessly..." he trails off. He doesn't want to embarrass her, but she is already embarrassing herself plenty enough as is.

It's enough for her to nearly jump out of her clothes. It takes her record time to get into a suitable state of unarmored for sleeping, most of which is spent staring at the ground and wishing she were anywhere but standing in the middle of a field and getting undressed while everyone else is already laying down in their sleeping bags by then. She picks up her bag and throws it into the nearest open space, nearly smacking Pallegina in the process. _Okay, I guess tonight I’ll be sleeping with Pallegina. Wait, no._ By _Pallegina. Not with. By_. Pallegina merely exhales loudly through her nose (“It's not huffing”, Pallegina is always quick to correct; she gets very mad when she's accused of being "huffy") and turns on her side, facing the other direction.

As the night creeps on, minute by minute, Xoti finds herself wider and wider awake, intimately aware of everything in the world that makes her uncomfortable. The rock in the middle of her back, the chirping of all the lonely creatures out in the wilds who wanna mate (highly relatable), the fact that she's already shifted four times in last two minutes and doesn't wanna risk annoying the huffy woman next to her, the continued burning in her cheeks. To top it all off, she needs to pee.

 _It's possible,_ she tells herself, _that paladins are all heavy sleepers. I mean, they have to be able to get some shut-eye anywhere, right? And they have to be able to sleep through storms and far-off cannons and such, right?_ She steels herself. She's up for the task. She's gonna go pee.

If there was ever a test of how heavily someone sleeps, it would be Xoti trying to "quickly but sneakily" remove herself from a sleeping bag. The zipper gets stuck, she loses her sock at the bottom of the bag, her clothes stick all static-like to the inside of the bag, her legs get caught in the strings as she frees herself from the bag itself. There's a reason she chose to be a priestess and _not_ a rogue. In her excitement to be free and her primal urge to leave the scene of the crime, she even forgets to put on her shoes. It's like that sometimes.

Luckily, she has no encounters with any wild beasts or unnatural forces during her late night errand; but she is slightly annoyed with herself. She didn't need to relieve herself, and had risked her hide for nothing at all. _You're overreacting_ , she think-shouts at herself, _you're just tired and restless and wanted to get up to inconvenience yourself. Can you at least_ try _to sleep?_

When she finally curled back up into her sleeping bag, she really did try to sleep. Nearly half an hour of shifting her legs and trying to get comfortable passed before she realized the problem. The hot, heavy feeling resting at the bottom of her stomach was not her bladder, she was aroused. It had been over an hour at that point, and she still couldn't get over the idea that the stuck-up paladin laying next to her was no more experienced than her. Unfortunately, taking care of arousal is a much more complicated process than taking care of a full bladder. But she isn't that noisy, and Pallegina hadn't stirred during her prior excursion, so maybe-

 _No_.

The possibility of her waking up while Xoti tried to take care of her problem was too much to risk. She would never be able to look Pallegina in the eyes again. She would merely wait it out.

And so for a second time, Xoti _tried_ to sleep. But knowing why she couldn't sleep made it far harder. It would be so simple, and she's always slept soundly afterwards. A tantalizing promise. While stuck between the fear of being caught by Pallegina and the desire to get off, her brain synthesized a new thought: wouldn't it be kinda hot if Pallegina caught her getting off? _No. No it wouldn't be. It would be mortifying._ But her vagina thought very much so the contrary. She was gonna completely soak through her panties at this point. There was no other option, really.

She turned onto her side, covering herself as much as possible from Pallegina, as she slipped her hands between her thighs. She realized her panties were already soaked as she ground up into the firmness of her upper palm. She bit her lip and shimmied further into her bag; if just grinding against her hand already had her so worked up, she needed to prepare herself for the embarrassingly near future of being a bit too loud. There really was no stopping now, and Xoti no longer had any interest in doing so.

Before she could go any further, that bra had to come off. After a little fighting against the sleeping bag, she managed to reach around and unhook it. Her free hand immediately found it's way to a now-exposed breast. She isn't a huge fan of playing with her titties, they aren't that sensitive, but it's good to appreciate them and give them love anyway. Another pair of titties that Xoti finds fun to appreciate are the ones Pallegina carries around. Xoti would love to get her hands all over them. She wonders if they would be sensitive, if she could bring her over the edge just by sucking at her nipples, what sounds she would make. The more she thinks about the rack Pallegina has, the more she starts loving on her own. She rolls her nipple between her thumb and forefinger, quietly sighing at the jolts it sends through her entire body down to her increasingly more desperate pussy. Working both hands just like this nearly has her singing already.

Her lower hand moves to a more teasing position. She's made up her mind and decided to enjoy this moment as much as she can, no rush. There's not a whole lot of time to yourself on the road, always someone right beside you, and a moment spent rubbing and pinching and petting herself is priceless. A secret of her's is that she's actually quite ticklish, a bigger secret of her's is that it's a huge turn on. She drags the back of her hand across the bottom of her stomach, where the coiling heat in her keeps building, and smiles contentedly at the pleasure the light touch brings her. She runs her hand all around the outside of her pussy, never quite touching it. She brushes over her thighs, right above her pubic bone, over her hips (thoroughly enjoying the involuntary twitch and buck that brings her, repeating the motion over and over), and lightly, teasingly, tapping and rubbing her rear with the soft pads of her fingers. She wonders if Pallegina is ticklish, what she could do to make her buck and squirm in her lap. Does she ever touch herself? Even just squeeze her own ass? It'd be a damn shame if such a squeezable ass never got the attention it deserved. Has she ever done that for herself? Maybe. Maybe she’s appreciated her shapely breasts, her rock-solid abdomen, her long legs with perfect calves. Maybe she takes half as much satisfaction from her back and shoulder muscles as Xoti does. Maybe she uses her beefy thighs to hold a pillow in place as she drags her clit across it at night when no one is watching. Maybe when she cleans herself up in the bath, she lingers a bit longer than necessary somewhere that makes her sigh and shiver.

Maybe she's never done any of that. Maybe Xoti could play at being the experienced one, show her how it feels to be rubbed and squeezed and touched feather-light in all the right places. Maybe Xoti could coax her out of her shell, be the first to show her how good she could feel? Would she be nervous? By Gaun, that would be a sight to see. 

As much as she enjoys feeling herself over her clothes, the panties had to go. In a much less graceful and stealthy maneuver than she had used to remove her bra, she wriggled out of her panties and kicked them off her legs. No one had stirred at her sounds thus far, so where's the harm? At long last, she was fully exposed and ready to dive in. No more teasing, just giving her pussy exactly what it needs, and at this point all of Xoti was very, very needy. Removing her panties gave her burning hot cunt a breeze of cold air, and made her more intimately aware of just how wet she was. Her slick was running everywhere and sticking to her inner thighs. She lubed up her finger from the wetness on her slit, and spread the slick all over her labia, bringing a deep groan to her lips that she mostly stifled. She needed this. She's needed this for a while.

Once her whole vagina was hot and wet, she moved on to her clit. Xoti held this part off for as long as she could take, not wanting to overstimulate the most sensitive part of her body, but she couldn't hold off anymore. Slicking her finger, she gently strokes along her clit, lubricating it as best she could. It would need to be wet, because otherwise she would rub herself raw with how much she planned to play with it. Already she'd subconsciously begun grinding into it with her finger in a back-and-forth stroke. She wouldn't last long like this, not as long as she'd like. Reluctantly, she pulled away for the moment.

Moving her finger downwards to her slit, she wasted no time in pushing in as quickly as she could go without hurting herself. She needed to be fucked, _now_. It wasn't the most pleasing part of masturbating, but it sure as hell was satisfying. All of her pent up sexual frustration was being channeled into fucking her finger, and then two of her fingers, then three. Her free hand was used as a free arm as she buried her face in her elbow, whimpering with need. As she mercilessly thrusted her fingers into herself, she let her thoughts drift back to the woman sleeping soundly (at least, she hoped she was sleeping) beside her. Xoti wondered what Pallegina would look like with her legs spread wide and both her wrists held down in Xoti's hand. Would she squirm and howl as Xoti fucked her? Would she beg for more? Xoti had never heard or read (and certainly not seen) anything telling her how women fuck each other, but she knew damn well what she wanted. She wanted to ride Pallegina's thigh as she made her scream and thrash around her fingers. Xoti subconsciously readjusted herself so she could grind down on her fingers on the downstroke and rub her palm against her clit on the upstroke, imagining a thigh between her's. She imagined giving Pallegina a first time neither of them would ever forget. She imagined grabbing her by her wide hips, perfect hand-holds to keep her exactly where she wanted her, and grinding every part of her pussy up against every part of Pallegina's. She imagined holding her down and sucking on her breasts. She imagined completely undoing the stoic and unyielding paladin beside her, making her forget everything but how to buck against Xoti's hips and scream her name and-

Xoti's orgasm caught her by surprise. She squeaked out a surprised gasp, followed by a soft but full-bodied moan as she shook from her core. Stars burst behind her eyes as they rolled back. Nothing at all passed through her mind as she rode out her orgasm against her hand, feeling both like an eternity of ecstasy, but also not nearly long enough. Almost as soon as her eyes refocused and her brain went back to thinking again, she closed her eyes, shut off her brain, and went to sleep.

_______***********_______

Morning came and Xoti found herself in an incredibly good mood. A deep night's sleep, a completely relaxed body, and one of her more animalistic needs thoroughly taken care of. She had a bit of a difficult time getting her bra and panties on without getting out of her sleeping bag, but she made do. Everything was coming up Xoti.

"Xoti," a familiar voice last heard in her dreams said, "don't you ever do that again when I'm sleeping next to you." 

_Oh_.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading my first smut fic! *pops open one of those New Year's confetti poppers* Since this is my first attempt at writing porn, I would super much appreciate feedback or tips on how to get into this genre :)


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